This one's for you Ewan!

It's getting a little old how I start off blog entries with "it's been too long", "this is way past due". I need to come up with another way of saying "sometimes it's impossible to find the time". Well, it is currently "impossible" to find the time to blog. I have so many I need to write, for example, 1. About our family the Scott's moving back to England and 2. I started a new job...well, new/old. Zipatoni is now Rivet and they offered me a job that I took back on November 12th. 3. Our trip to Tallahassee for Thanksgiving, 4. Crying about #1 and 2, ok, just a little bit of crying about #2, we are unusually busy for the season but I'm keeping a float!

So with all this said..."This one's for you Ewan!" This one is for you! I will be starting a label titled "Ewan" and it will be all the fun recordings e and I want you to hear. This one we did the other day cause we were missing you. Enjoy!

History and Grace

I felt it was important to take time out to write about a day we recently had, this day will go down in history. On Tuesday, November 4, 2008 we elected the first African American President to the United States. I am so proud to be part of such history. I downloaded a transcript of his speech (making a word document out of it) and now I see I can not attach it. As I write, I will debate on including it as a whole or grabbing some of the many touching parts.

It was the very next day that I saw a man walking into the post office that sparked much of what I want to write in this entry. This man was probably around 75-85 years old, even without the best posture he walked with such pride and his skin was a beautiful shade of brown. As he walked by and we both smiled I got into my car and cried. I started thinking about all the reactions to this election. His, mine, and those who are angry. I've been listening either on the news or even on (this great way to communicate) Facebook and the responses are, well, alarming. These reactions started me thinking....

I'm not sure how many that read this are faithful and I'm not sure you even need to be to understand some of my thoughts and feelings. I think that it is important to write them down for many reasons, mainly for my little boy. However, if grace stirs in your heart...that's wonderful!

We before conception, I'm fairly certain, were not in heaven looking down and choosing our social demographic, color of skin and parents. So when we're born we are who we've been chosen to be (or for some the luck of the draw). Do we as humans choose to be a) a little girl with dark skin who will one day be asked to sit in the back of the bus? b) a little white boy who's father touches him inappropriately? c) a rich, brown skinned little boy who fights daily with his heritage because both sides are unexcepting? or d) a little white girl who's raised by her nanny rather than her parents because they are driven to the almighty dollar vs. loving their daughter?

Guess what Americans you didn't get to choose who you were. You do however get to choose who you are. And yes, you get to choose who you are regardless of how you were raised (another blessed choice). I believe we all were carefully crafted beautifully and placed just where each of us needed to be. I believe God gave us his son to cleanse us of our sins so that the sinful choices we do make have already been forgiven. His hope is that we learn from those choices and not live with blame but rather a soft heart that is full of forgiveness (and I'm not ignoring accountability). We need to learn what it is to be a "good person", for if you took a poll I'm certain you'd get slightly different answers or those from our commandments. And those who quote the commandments are especially interesting when they then decide that how we got those commandments are bogus, better yet some should apply and others not so much.

Where is your heart? Are you full of pride because you grew up in a large home and received everything you wanted? Are you full of anger because you didn't grow up that way? Did my son choose to be raised in a split home where his Mommy and Daddy no longer love each other that way anymore? Did your neighbor choose to be dark skinned only to have people hate him because of it?

I think I'll come back to this. It's time to get ready for tumble class with my boy. He's been wiggling around for me to finish so I will close for now asking any who read this to think about what I've said. I didn't write this to spark debate on faith but rather for you to stop and think about the very simple question, did you get to choose who you started out to be? The answer is NO. Let's give ourselves and each other some heart filled grace. I bet you'll see the world differently and feel lighter as a result.

(I'll post the transcript of details of it later.)

A Special Gift For A Special Friend

e and Ewan just turned 3. As you see from the Birthday post the theme was trucks. On their invite I created out of construction paper a garbage truck. Here is one I created out of fabric.

This was Ewan's Birthday gift from e and I. I will be making another one for e soon. When Aunt C came to visit she brought e an iron-on to wear on his Birthday but it didn't quite come out as she had hoped. So on his gray hoodie I will be making another for him (covering up the iron-on). That picture is to come. We love you Ewan!

The Boys Celebrate Their 3rd!

This is the invitation for the boys, Karl helped with the typography this year.

e and Ewan celebrated their 3rd Birthdays together again this year. We had a great time! This year was so special for many reasons, some I will share now and others I will share in a post at a later date.

We celebrated at the park with a few very close friends and family. The kids enjoyed the truck theme with hard hats and all! Louise and my Mom (Grandma) made really yummy treats. This year was super special because Celine was able to come in town and celebrate with us. Celine, my cousin e's second cousin lives in Tallahassee. She's Aunt C to e. It was a really fun visit. e continues to talk about his time with her. We will be seeing her soon this November along with Aunt Lo, Papa Joe, Great Gran and lots more family and friends.

Here are some fun pics from the day.
Thank you to everyone who was able to come!

Pumpkin muffins with cream cheese icing with trucks on top!

Thank you Celine for the hard hats! I made the trash cans with Oscar on top filled with Oreo dirt and gummy worms. P.S. The Oreo cookies were the healthy version, the worms...not so much.

Our handsome boys!

All the kids minus Poppi she didn't feel like getting her picture taken.

After the party we came back to the house and had lunch together. The boys continued to play, here are some videos of their fun.

E was doctoring Ewan. This video cracks me up...how he tells him how he feels and that he has a present for him.

The boys singing.

The boys drawing their birthday cake. Lots and lots of icing.

This year e celebrated his third Birthday a couple of times. Not only did we celebrate as a family with Ewan but his Daddy and Janine threw him a second party in the park.

e's Daddy surprised him that morning with a brand new bike, with training wheels! He does so well! On his actual day we celebrated again with Ewan, Louise, Anya, Grandma, John and Kara. It was a perfect day with those we love. And John was the perfect punching bag! The boys love ruff housing with him. Thanks guys for being with us!

Wheels On The Bus...

go round and round, round and round, round and round the wheels on the bus go round and round all around the town. |E's version| The Mommy's on the bus go I love you, I love you, I love you, the Mommy's on the bus go I love you all around the town!

Great Weekend Started With A Happy Friday

This week was the first of a new schedule at work. I am now working 4-day work weeks. This is truly an answer to prayer...many, many where I would hope for more time with my boy. Even though he is almost 3 (putting his father's and I separation at 2.5 years) I still struggle from time to time with the time we share. Knowing it's amazing time with his father, it's been hard not to have a day with E without any obligations. Our custody arrangements are not the typical every other weekend scenario, my days with E have always been with filled commitments.

Prior to Friday I looked into a tumble class for E. He loves the commercials by The Little Gym. So after doing some research I enrolled him into their gymnastics classes. Friday was our first day and he was truly thrilled. He did a great job. Nervous (only at first) of the tallest balance beam he ran to every aperatus and defeated any fear. He swung on the uneven bars, bear walked on the parallel bars. E did forward rolls with ease and walked the balance beam only having his one hand in mind, the other out and his eyes not focused down but forward. His skills caught his teachers attention. It was a joy to watch him. The rest of the day was spent with his best buddy Ewan. Louise and I look forward to sharing our Fridays and continuing to grow the boys friendship.

This evening after dinner E and I decided to make our own holiday decorations. E loves to get out his scissors.
Our creation:

It was a perfect evening with the house opened enjoying the beautiful fall weather.

E, I had a lovely weekend with you. I look forward to our Fridays together!

Where does one start?...

With September over in a few days, I see that my last entry was September 2nd so I'm beyond overdue for a post. I think this is a record for the least amount of entries in a month. And truth be told, there was a lot this month to talk about but time escaped me and now I must get creative on what to share and where to start....

I'll start at the beginning of the month with our travels. Early this month e went on his first "Hunt Vacation". His Daddy took him to the lake, a place that holds special memories for him as a child so I know it meant a lot to take his boy there. e, Bull Shoals lake is a special place for many reasons. Not only is it a place that carries a lot of history of your father's family but I learned it holds history of mine as well. Your great great grandfather helped build the dam and maintained cabins there many many years ago. This was my father's mother's father. I'll never forget how excited your Great Gran was to know I was traveling there, she has fond memories of that place as well.

Your Daddy told me you traveled pretty well during the long 4 hour drive down. You were met with more of your family there, Lala, Pop, Uncle Kevin and Aunt Christy. From the photos and video taken it looked like you had an amazing time. Not to mention how you continue to talk to this day about how much fun you had. The wind in your hair, how the boat went fast, your new friend, everything spoken so quickly you can barely get it all out. Don't worry, I'm certain you'll spend a lot more time down at the lake.

While you were traveling I also made a special trip with Andrea to Boston to visit our friends Sara and Ana. It was a good visit, a healthy, blessed one supporting our friend who needed to be with her girlfriends. One day my boy you will have friends you care for so deeply that when they hurt you'll find the way to be there right by their side. It was such a great trip that it deserves its own entry titled "loving your friends" (I smile).

The time away was good and I was so happy to receive so many reports of how you were doing. You would jump on the phone and ask if I was still in Boston or if I was home now. You would share something fun from that day and then quickly jump off the phone to get to your next activity. My favorite call was one you left in my voice mail saying that you loved and missed me and good night. I thanked your Daddy for that one, I would listen to it every night while we were apart. I speak of this time apart because it was our first time being apart for that long. It was hard but it was great for the both of us!

It seems like the month went by quickly after traveling. We quickly got back on schedule and filled our weekends visiting with friends. Hence why I'm just now writing during a lunch break because it's the best available time. Some other fun September news would be:

• You got a handsome haircut.
• You went to a Balloon glow (second year, this year with fireworks...you love this!).
• Had a candle light dinner with Grandma.
• Started having private book time where you're enjoying reading your books alone.
• Although your Birthday isn't until next month, you've starting sharing already that you are 3.
• Your best buddy Ewan has been missing you so much that he walks around with an invisible e friend.
• I received a final email at work stating that our office is going to a 4-day work week! This means I get a wonderful full Friday with you that we'll spend at The Little Gym in a tumble class and having great visits with your buddy Ewan. We'll replace the imaginary e with the real one!
• You are definitely coming "into your own". It's been a difficult time with you but a memorable one. A time where I'm not only learning a lot about you but about myself as well. I'm learning to give you grace and patience. Yes, even when I'm dishing out the discipline I'm full of love and learning! I'm also learning during trying times with you that your father and I are truly on board together raising you. Although we don't live under the same roof, we connect daily keeping each other informed of behaviors and disciplines so that we don't confuse you with different methods. We're parenting together and several times this month I've shared that we're doing about as best as you can get for a "divided family". I hope e, you grow up feeling this togetherness rather than ever feeling split apart.

I'll work on doing better next month. It's going to be a busy a October. Birthday's, family visits and holidays. Love you e!

Momos

Tonight was a special treat night with e.

Tonight e and I went to dinner together because tomorrow I leave for Boston. e and I will be traveling but this time separate. I will be traveling to Boston and e will be going to the lake with his Daddy. I know we are both going to have memorable times but I have to admit I've never been away from him for this long so my heart aches already.

We've been talking about our separate trips and he communicates the differences very well. He asked if I was going to be with him at the lake and I shared that I wouldn't be but rather traveling with Andrea to Boston to see Sara and Ana. I told him if he misses me he can always see me in his minds eye and he could always call me.

I forget if I've blogged about his "minds eye", I'll look for that entry and either link up to it later or write about it when I have more time. It's pretty cute and very effective. I want to write tonight about our dinner at Momos.

We went to Momos, a tapas style restaurant. He likes it there because of its Moroccan feel. Some of the booths are like couches (as he describes). We sat right next to each other and ordered the following: shrimp kabobs, hummus, potatoes and flaming cheese. For dessert we ordered chocolate ice cream. Not only did he eat that line up but he tried a katamala olive and ate two along with cucumbers and tomatoes dipped in his hummus.

When we ordered the flaming cheese he watched wide eyed as the cheese went up into flames. I prepped him for "op ah" but he ended up burring his head in my lap cause it was too much attention. Later he got to see someone else order it, he looked, listened and then asked me "what does 'op ah' mean?" Not knowing the answer I asked our waiter, he didn't know either so he asked another...it means "hooray" or "cheers". So e would take his cucumber dipped in hummus and "op ah" mine or our drinks or our shrimp...it was pretty cute.

After dinner we went to the bar to watch the fish in the big aquarium. Then we said good night to all the pretty ladies at the bar along with the wait staff.

e,
I loved our night together. I'm going to miss you very much. Have a wonderful time with your Daddy and family. I can't wait to hear all about it when we both return.
I love you bunches!
Mommy

Classical

e has really taken to classical music. Ever since he was a baby I have been playing it in the car. I've always enjoyed listening to the music even though I don't know much about its history. e has labeled the channel, the violin station.

Lately when we've been listening I've been putting a story behind the music. As I mentioned I don't know the composers well so I use my imagination. To name a few examples...The high pitched, rhythmic sounds are mice or ants. The low, slow horns a fox, wolf, or bear. The stringed instruments can also take on an environment like a storm or sunny day. I will start the story and e will chime in adding in his little details.

One day I heard a piece that sounded very familiar, yet I couldn't figure out from where. I started my make-believe illustrations and then thought I was listening to Peter And The Wolf. I then shifted the illustrations to fit the story and when the piece was finished it was announced as being from Fantasia. Ah! I had recognized it but put the wrong story to it. I then got excited and told e what the music's illustrations really were and that I would rent for him the Disney movie. He thought it was pretty silly to hear about dishes, bubbles and brooms dancing.

The other day after picking e up from school he asked if I would turn on the "mouse" song. I didn't understand his request until he asked again calling it the "mouse and wolf" song. Ah, he wanted the classical station and immediately wanted to imagine the illustrations.

What is also so fantastic is that e will listen to the music and match the characters mood to the compositions. If the music sounds somber, he will ask why the mouse is sad. Or when the music is loud with cymbals and drums he will say that the mouse is scared cause the wolf is coming to get him. He pays close attention to the musical notes and generates an emotion that I believe is wonderfully fitting.

I recommend when driving with e to turn on the classical station. Ask him what he hears, perhaps help him with his choice of characters and watch/listen to his imagination grow. I look forward to our stories. I look forward to him playing an instrument one day.

Juicy e!

This week you can visit: http://publicbroadcasting.net/kwmu/arts.artsmain

e had a great time with Daddy, Janine, Kris, Nikki and Poppi at Eckerts picking peaches. This was one of the shots I posted to his Flickr site and sent to the group KWMU, St. Louis Life. They selected it to be the photo of the week.


This shot of Ewan and e playing at Tower Grove was selected about a year ago.

Do you think he needs a portfolio?

Thanks KWMU!

Singing In The Rain At Grandma's House Part II

Part II...yes, he's pretty Glorious!

Singing In The Rain At Grandma's House Part I

e and I had a great weekend. He was super busy with both his Daddy and I. Saturday night we headed over to spend the night with Grandma. I can't quite seem to understand why as soon as I walk in the door I get an overwhelming feeling of LAZY! e and Gran headed off to play and I made my way to the couch to watch loads and loads of cable!

These videos are after e's bath. Gran taught e "Singing In The Rain". This is him being hilariously adorable singing his new song.

Enjoy!

(Just made the decision to make a Part I and II look at both entries!)

Note: These are large files. I don't have QuickTime Pro to downsize them for web. So grab yourself a drink while they upload.

Old Skool On Facebook

It's been a lot of fun catching up with old friends on Facebook. So much fun lately because Brent James has been taking old mix tapes he's found and generating these podcasts. As he would post the notes he would tag friends that would enjoy music from the good-ol-days. It was fun to watch everyone post their thank yous and beg for more (my self included). As I read replies this image came to mind. It's my new profile pic.

It's been fun! Enjoy the music from my childhood.

http://www.brentalanjames.com/podcast25.mp3

http://www.brentalanjames.com/podcast34.mp3

http://www.brentalanjames.com/podcast48.mp3

Thank You Friends

I realize that some posts (like the last entry) are more for me, "the mommy" than fun to read. I know his voice and see his facial expressions and am constantly amazed at everything I forget and wish I would have written down. Before I sat down and wrote that last entry I swore I had twelve more moments but they all slipped my mind. And for that reason is why I blog, I don't want everything lost in my memory.

This weekend was a great one spent with loving friends. It started Friday night with a girls night for me. e enjoyed his Saturday with Daddy in the park (our weather here has been crazy beautiful, highs of 80 and lows of 60) and I enjoyed spending time over at the Mowery's with Daniella too. Later that night Rachel invited us to stay for dinner and spend the night. The Mowery's somewhat recently moved to my old neighborhood the one that e's Daddy still lives in. I miss the neighborhood for the very reason that on Saturday I was able to walk over to pick up e from Rachel's house. I took the wagon and rolled him back for our slumber party.

Our last slumber party over at the Mowery's didn't go so well. At midnight we had to leave because e's molars were hurting him terribly. It was easier and more comfortable for him to go home than for us to run out to Walgreens making the slumber a success. This time we were free of painful molars. e, Ella and Simon played wonderfully together and the night was a great evening spent with great friends.

While observing the kids playing (e almost 3, Ella just turned 4 and Simon 2 in Dec.) I loved the imagination and imitations. I've been encouraging e to read on his own. We read a lot together and he does a fantastic job reading to me but the alone time is what isn't developing yet. Ella is wonderful at reading; taking several books, curling up in a corner and creating her own stories from memorization and from the illustrations. I was able to watch e do the same thing. At bed time after they were washed up I took e and Ella downstairs for story time. Story time consisted of both of them each with their own pile not only reading to themselves but each other. Finally it was my turn with The Cat In The Hat so I quickly jump over this word and that completing it in a timely manner.

They played monster imagination, they danced to (one of my all time favorite soundtracks) Pretty and Pink, read books and e even let Ella play beauty shop with his luscious hair. All the while Rachel and I had great adult conversation and catch up time. There is nothing like your girlfriends! There is nothing like friendship e! Thank you friends!

(As we left and were giving love to our friends, Ella hugged e and said, "I'm going to miss you"...we'll see you soon my friend!)

A Few Of My Favorite Things

I'm overdue, it has been a busy couple of weeks. I have several entries I want to write but haven't managed my time to write them. So tonight before I go to bed I'd like to share some recent "favorite things":

• Lately with great enthusiasm e will say, "I've got a great idea!"
• I'm quite certain I've been over allowing e to watch the Bee Movie cause he's certain we have one in our home. Every morning he speaks of "the bee" he saw.
• I got to go on a field trip with e for the first time to Grant's Farm. It was a fun day! We got to feed the animals and watch a elephant poop and pee...more to come on the outing.
• I recently saw a cute pic of a friends daughter in the tub. The water was shallow enough so that she could lay flat and her hair made for fun/silly Medusa like pics. Why I hadn't thought of this for our bath time routine and rising e's hair...I don't know? He gets such a kick out of it. He'll let the water go, swirling it to help it down the drain. He'll lay back testing the depth and with patience wait for just the right height. Note: It's great for rising the soap out without water in the eyes.

As you can see they don't have to be big things, it's the little things that are repeated daily; new words forming sentences, imagination, adventure, poop and silly water play.

Love you e.

A Roman Original

I continue to truly enjoy getting to know so many wonderful families at Jubilee. My friendship with Sara and Roman is growing. They have two adorable little girls, one close in age with e so they get to play from time to time. Roman is an Architect. Sara an Educator and amazing Mother.

I invite you to see their blogs here:
http://rowaz.blogspot.com/
http://thereshegrows.blogspot.com

My friend Karl sent me Roman's blog where he keeps his gallery of work. I fell in love with his artistry and I can now proudly say that I'm an owner of a Roman original.


Elevation III
If you couldn't tell, this is a painting of my dream home.

Thank you both! I will cherish it!

It's Complete!

My other Craigslist find...a brand new Ikea bed (not the one I originally wanted) that I didn't have to drive to Chicago to get. I met a girl who was moving back to Japan and needed to sell her lovely new platform bed. It's perfect and completes e's room.

He was very happy to see it when he came home from Daddy's.

Lollipop, Lollipop!

So last nights post was too lengthy, so I share this story today.

This is e and his special lollipop treat.

Potty training e was actually rather easy. I've written about this before. I was more nervous about it than he was, worrying about when I would find the time. I didn't have to reward him with special these and that's, for him it was more about the games we'd play on the potty.

What I did start doing though is giving him a special treat if he came home in the same underwear as he went to school in. I thought it would be a nice reward for an accident free school day. I bought these lollipops at Trader Joes. They are colored with natural ingredients like turmeric for the yellow and beet juice for the red. No yellow #4 crappies!

Anyway, he loves them... We also sing the song together... You know the song where at the end of it you make the pop noise in your cheek?

This photo is of him having his lollipop while watching The Bee Movie while I cook dinner. When I asked him if it was watermelon flavored he just looked at me and said... e: "Noooooo! It's not a watermelon Mommy!"

So What Do You Think About That?

Tonight has been full of fun. So much so that this post will be a collage of it all.

First, I will start with the end of the evening. I'm doing this so that I can properly script our evenings prayers. When e and I say prayers we always start with giving thanks and end with blessing family, friends, pets or even perhaps his toys around the room. The routine is such that I say the thank you part and he names the names. Well tonight was different, e asked to say the thank you part and I say the names. It went a little something like this...
e: thank you Jesus for I like that I'm better, I feel better. And I took a nap at Daddy's house. And I saw a dinosaur. /saying to me/ your prayers? yeah? Okay.
me: Daddy
e: Good, okay
me: Mommy /his same response/Elliott.../and on and on/

See, last night was a Daddy night and when I give thanks I always say for a nice time at Daddy's house. So his version was remembering that he slept there and then taking it further to remembering (giving thanks for) the weekend at the Science Center and making a dinosaur at Build-A-Bear. And the "okay" part, he's been saying this a lot lately as to give confirmation that it was a good thought, suggestion, comment etc. And I always say "good" after he names a name so that's where he got that part.

It's just so sweet to hear him and then to know that he's caught on to giving thanks before we launch into our needs and wants. I'll have to record him sometime, narrating it just doesn't give it justice.

Earlier this evening was the first time I heard him ask me "so, what do you think about that?". It was to a line-up of the evening; when we were to play, eat dinner and so forth. He placed it all nice and neatly into his own order of favorites and then asked me my thoughts. Pretty cute.

After dinner he decided he wanted to take pictures. Not the kind on the computer but with my camera. It was sitting out, grabbed his attention and so I decided to coach him on proper handling and shooting. Here are a few he took...


Lastly, I had to catch on camera his maternal instincts. You would think I have another baby in my belly and I've been preparing him for a sibling. He's been taking to his animals and now a baby doll so much and caring for them so intently. I can't help but watch him and get a little melancholy that I can not give him a brother or sister now. I would truly love to e.

We can pray to Jesus, "what do you think about that" ? ; )

Art Camp Installation

I believe the camp was a success. I am very thankful to all the OneBlazers who helped and all those behind the scenes!

This is a photograph of the installation (that is currently up for the rest of the week) along with the entire team of helpers and my students.

Once the installation is down, I will salvage some pieces to make a permanent piece. I will also complete the (ever-so-late) piece from last year. My hope is that every year we create a work of art that will forever hang on the walls of Jubilee.

Enjoy!

2008 Jubilee Art Camp

I have had the fortunate opportunity to work the Jubilee Art Camp again this year. The camp started on Wednesday and will end on Friday. My days have been; work, teach and Mommy.

It's been a rather hectic week, e was sick at the beginning of it. I prayed I wouldn't catch what he had because I had no back up and 33 children on my roster. I've survived day two and am ready for tomorrow.

Here are some pictures I took today. The children seem to be truly enjoying themselves. Day one we worked on a large watercolor mural (which you will see in the background of some of the pictures). Today was a day of sculpture. Tomorrow will start with a sand sculpture project and end with an installation. We will take all of our creations and install them, leaving them up for two weeks. The children will participate in this event so that they understand the importance of presentation.

We not only create Art in my classroom but speak to the pieces and exhibit them. To be a true Artist you must be able to speak about the work you've created and present it well. I look forward to the pictures I will take tomorrow and meeting the parents. We've invited family and friends. The installation will be up for several weeks in hopes many will return to see it.

This camp was free but the work generated out of it....priceless! It's amazing to watch such talent in these children. I was even blessed with some children with special needs. Their approach to their crafts was truly amazing to watch. I continue to learn from the students I teach, thank you!

e Hunt Tooted

(Click on the title...it will take you to the audio)

Ok, this was too silly to pass up.

e was home sick today and we were getting a little stir crazy. This is what we did for fun.

Enjoy!

P.S. I repeated it twice at the end if you missed it.

Fun Photos To Share

This photo is of e after we set up Ewan Fish's tank. I asked him if he was happy he had a pet fish.


This photo is the first one e has ever took with my camera. I took a picture of him so he wanted to take a picture of me. He held it well and this is what he took.


Then e decided he wanted to take another photo so this is one he took of his horse.


This is our new armoire I found off of Craigslist. An amazing deal from a very sweet family I met who are moving overseas. I'm so happy to hide the television away now.

A New Addition To Our Family...

...meet Ewan Fish.

Although e's Birthday isn't for several months, I have managed to finish his Birthday shopping and gave him one of the two presents yesterday. Ewan Fish is an early Birthday present. Because of my continued guilt of e not having a pet at Mommy's house (e has Lola at his Daddy's house, a miniature Dotson) I bought him a Beta fish.

Yesterday I had to go see my printer and next door is a pet store. I got in my car, thought about it, drove away discouraging myself and then backed up the car to go in and make the purchase. Yes, that pet store was going nowhere but I felt the need to buy him a fish.

I was able to pick up e from school early. Excited, I showed him his surprise in the car after he was unsuccessful at guessing. First it was "a special treat?" then "a shirt?" so wa-la I pulled out his new fish. After discouraging him to hold the bag of water in the car, I put it back in the front seat safely with me and asked him to think of a name for his new pet.

After awhile I asked him if he had decided on a name, he said:
"Probably I name him Ewan Fish."
Me: "Your new fish's name is Ewan Fish?"
e: "Yes, that's a very nice name."

So welcome Ewan Fish to our family.

Good Morning Acrobats!

So this morning...guess what I woke to...

This morning I got up quietly, tiptoed to the shower and managed to bathe without a child peeping in. Shortly thereafter I heard a little voice "Mommy", I went into his room and there he was with a huge grin on his face. I went to him gave him lots of love and said "Good morning".

Just then he started doing acrobats, yes, a little leg here and kick-out there. I commented "Wow, those are some stretches!" He started to giggle and then arabesqued off his bed to show me another which was a leap on one foot. e: "Look at this one Mommy".

Now that's what I'm talking about! These are the mornings that erase a good week of disobedience!

Probably

e has been displaying a lot of separation anxiety lately. I've noticed this "other personality" coming in along with the back left molar. I'm hoping I can just blame it on the tooth and once it's in say goodbye to the attitude...one can hope.

The truth is it just might be a phase that comes with the ever-so-close age of 3. If so I might be whining A LOT in my entries, I'll apologize now to those of you who pop in from time to time. Thankfully I am blessed with beautiful Mothers who will write me words of encouragement and send me to other blogs where my issues seem like a walk in the park. A little ruthless that we get pleasure from other Mothers with the same if not worse parenting issues but in all serious, to know you are not alone...so much comfort! (...hey, guess what, I'm winging it too!)

Tonight was a good night after I literally wrestled him to the ground in laughter cause all I was hearing was whining and for me to pick him up. "Mommy hold me!" It was either that or me in full on tears. We were home, him and me, home, me here going nowhere and yet I needed to "hold him" as I walked to the bathroom and even better, then he wanted to sit on my lap as I peed! e in full on tears mode as I tried to use the restroom. So I picked him up, body slammed in on his bed and began to tickle until he begged me to stop.

After dinner and a bath we crawled in bed early for plenty of snuggle/quiet time. This is where I truly enjoyed hearing all about his day, reading books and prayers. Story 1: Apparently today a little girl named Zarya "yelled" at him not to play with her house but he "wanted to". We read a few books one in particular where you have to find the set of items within a picture. e is really good at this, he is very detail oriented and when locating the images it went a little something like this..."this is probably going to be hard to find, ah! here it is" pointing to it correctly in 2.2 seconds. Probably is his new word that he really enjoys using. For another example: "I probably need to play some more" or "I probably can't clean that up right now". Perhaps I should speak to his level and tell him that "Mommy is probably about to loose her marbles if he doesn't do as he's told".

I love you e!

Almost Complete

As I said I would, I'm posting e's finished room (well, finished until I make a trip to IKEA). I've also posted a picture of mine (which was e's old room). It's almost complete too. The only detail left for me to do is the wall decal. As seen on the other photo, this is Blik's Gerbera. It is in a true gold metallic and should look really nice on the dark chocolate walls.

I will make a trip to IKEA so that one day e's couch (couch bed) will be a real couch and he'll have a real bed. I'll purchase the twin size of mine. Then when we have guests they can take my room and I can bunk with e. I think the rooms are turning out nicely.

e was super excited to see his tent in his room. Although I'm sitting outside right now and could use a sweater, yes a sweater in the summer time (cold front)! It gets too hot for the tent outside. This way it will get played with lots.

Night, Night.

Sing, Sing A Song, Sing Out Loud, Sing Out Strong!

Double click on the title of this entry to hear e singing his song...several times.

This is a test to see if I properly linked e singing his ABC's! Here it goes!

Sorry to Rant...

but it's my blog.

There are days (like today) where I find it so hard to be a single Mommy and full-time professional. My morning went a little something like this...

Waking up a little late due to two 5 minute snoozes. Thinking I can jump in the shower cause e isn't up yet. Right as I'm about to step in I hear him (he slept in a little), I think I'll go ahead and jump in anyway and pray for patience with his morning milk. I'm in, he's at the shower not happy that he is without milk PLUS the water is ever so slightly touching him. I scurry only to get razor burn cause you can't scurry a good shave and hop out to get him some milk.

My getting ready time is fast, I think we're in good shape to actually get to school and work on time since yesterday I was way off. I get his shoes on. Why should I get his shoes on? Why should I put his clothes on? Why thread his belt? He is completely capable of clothing himself. BUT if I do this we will not hit our "time" to get out the door. He then continues to prolong potty time insisting that his body isn't "telling him". Which by the way, he is listening so well to his body (I know several people who could take note). His potty training is, well, perfect. He takes such ownership of it so I can't force the issue. Well, not forcing means off-schedule.

As we stepped to the potty our timing was already thrown and the kicker...I undid HIS belt. Melt down #2 (I'm calling no immediate milk #1). And this is what made me so sad, he SHOULD be allowed to undo his belt. He shouldn't be rushed to get from here to there. I'm all for schedule (as all of you who will read this know) so it's definitely not a case scenario where e is ruling the house. Times like "do it for him" vs. "let him do it himself" shouldn't even be in question but they are due to the reality that there isn't another I can beg to help while I work at getting presentable and e works on being independent.

Then in my rushed state opening the door, he yells from the bathroom "don't leave me Mommy", this isn't acceptable! NOPE! Never should these words ever leave his mouth. So I stop lean down to his level and ask him to come to me. Because he thinks he's in trouble he's dashing every other direction. After hollering about punishments and choices he comes so that I can stop to talk to him about understanding I'd NEVER leave him. I realize he's probably not meaning it the way it sounds but kinda is so I just strongly felt it needed some attention.

Then rain. Yes, after our talk he started crying about wanting to ride his bike and not going to school and then he saw rain. Are you seeing the sensitive pattern yet? Anyway, rain equaled running equaled me holding him equaled more crying cause he wanted to run himself and then all the way to school he whined about the entire morning and all I kept saying was for him to use his "big boy words". I had to ignore so much of the tantrum and this just made my eyes well-up even more.

They were all little things adding up between a Mommy and a little boy. A Mommy who is working full-time and a little boy who sometimes just wants to stay home and play. Me too e, me too, sometimes I wish I could just stay at home and play too!

I love you e!

Ok...so just as I finished this I received this from e's Daddy:
I know you've been comforted already, but.... he knows you're there for him even when things get rushed. It would be sad if your everyday was this way, but it's not at all. Routines get rushed at times and if anything it's a good life lesson for E to be flexible...

My reply:
You’re right. It’s not all the time and there are lessons to be learned even in the times of “rushed”. Good stuff...I am so thankful we are doing this together. Really, it’s not how we planned it, it’s not ideal...We’re doing good.

One Of My Most Favorite Moments...And Some

The other day Grandma came over around lunch time and spent the day and evening with e. As you'll see later in the post, they had a ton of fun. After a full day of play it was time for bed. Grandma learned quickly e's routine and if there was a part she would stumble on he was quick to correct her. As she tucked him in he asked about me, he would ask "is Mommy home yet"? Grandma shared with e that she would see to me coming in and giving him a kiss goodnight when I came home.

When I got home I heard all about their adventures and after Gran left I tiptoed into e's room to give him the promised kiss good night. After watching him sleep I leaned over and gave him a kiss on the cheek. To my surprise this little boy of mine who was just in a very deep sleep woke with a big smile on his face, said "Hello Mommy" and then quickly fell back to sleep.

I have to say, although it was a very simple moment, it was one of my most favorite moments with e. It was so special.

Love you e.
____________________________________________
And some...

e had a great 4th with his Daddy where he took a boat ride in Forest Park and watched fireworks in Webster Groves, both "firsts".

The boat ride left quite an impression on e. A new game he played with Grandma was called "boat". It requires a quilt a bit of leg strength and if you fall out they'd holler "man overboard". e was quick though to share that you don't do that in a real boat.

Grandma tried teaching e some "knock, knock" jokes. It went a little something like this, "knock, knock, who's there, Mr. Hunt".

Decoration

Ella Mowery: "What's that on your nose Jodi Hertz?"
Me: "Decoration Ella."
Ella Mowery: /as she takes off her princess ring and puts it on her nose/ "Look at my decoration."

Bryan (Ella's Father),
If you are reading this...I hope you are having a great time in England (while I'm having lots of fun with your family and inspiring your daughter)!
Your decorated friend,
Jodi Hertz

Happy Day!

Today started an extra long holiday weekend for the 4th. We were given today off in addition to tomorrow so I filled our day with lots of fun!

Visiting with Louise on Tuesday we planned on getting the boys together. Although it's been quite sometime since I had a four day week, I still very much miss having a full day with e. We met Louise, Ewan and Anya at the coffee shop early. Louise and I had yummy lattes and the boys played with all the toys. Afterwards it was time for the library where they were having story time.

e and I occasionally read a great book titled "Library Lion". This was a fun book to reference going to the library. We reviewed all the rules of the library like, no running and no roaring loudly. Anyway, we arrived along with many other children Ewan and e's age and younger. They had not only many fun books to read but a parachute. We played games with the parachute and read a couple books aloud. I was so proud of how e participated and listened.

After all the fun at the coffee shop and library we went back to Louise's house for lunch and rest. She fed us well (as always) and after the boys went down we had fun sipping tea, eating yummies and catching up.

Ewan and e play so well together. I continue to feel so blessed that their friendship is growing strong. Being in a place in my life where a sibling is not yet in my cards, it's so fantastic to see a brotherhood developing within the boys...very special!

Thanks Louise, Ewan and Anya for making this day a happy one! Oh, Happy Day!

To Grandmother's House We Go

You might want to grab a cup of tea or coffee it might be a long one...

So this weekend was quite special. e started off having a LaLa and Pop day on Friday and then Saturday I picked him up early from his Daddy's house to head to IL for a family reunion. The reunion was for my Grandma, my Mother's Mother. She had many siblings so it was a rather large crowd of people I don't remember ever meeting. It was a nice gathering with many thoughtful touches. They made sure there were activities for the children and for the adults a slide show of photographs that could be copied in addition to a scanner so that people could copy photographs that were not a part of their collection.

My Aunt Pat from CA and Uncle Charlie and Aunt Janice from FL made it putting a huge smile on my Mother's face. Her home was full of people just as she enjoys. It was e's first time meeting both Uncle Charlie and Aunt Janice. He took to them quickly and they both fell in love with his charm.

Now back to the reunion for some sweet e moments. The ride to southern IL was all the nap e got so with a not-so-rested boy and not-so-"organic" foods he wasn't the best boy ever. The sugar in his system along with lack of sleep made for many threats of "punishments". However the good always out weighs the bad because after a couple of adults made their way up to the karaoke machine e wasn't far behind them. I noticed him patiently watching and then he took Grandma's hand and asked nicely if he could have the microphone.

As the crowd settled down to listen and as I held the camera e began to sing his ABC's. After the cheer it was if he couldn't get enough so song number two was Jesus Loves Me, it went a little something like this..."Jesus loves me yes I do". His encore, ABC's again then he said thank you and ran into his proud Mommy's arms!

Sunday was a restful day because I couldn't shake this nasty cold. The family was kind to take e so that I could get lots of rest. Because the day was a lazy one, e was back on schedule with very good behavior. The day consisted of resting and visiting. After too many cough attacks I decided to take advantage of the additional helpful hands and called off from work for Monday. We spent another night at Grandma's house and rested again on Monday. It was great to lounge around and visit with the family.

Some additional fun moments this weekend:

• After e didn't get his way to go play outside because it was raining he proceeded to tell me that he "needed his exercise".
• For a majority of the weekend we were lions crawling around on the floor and roaring.
• We got to watch cable. Tarzan is new on our movie list now.
• I received a wonderful new film camera from my Uncle a Pentax Spotmatic which will act as a backup to my Pentax K1000.

I will post pictures after I get them developed...yes, developed...I'm still a fan of film vs. digital! I was anxious to use my new camera.

Thursday's Second Post: "What Are You Afraid Of?"

Today I was asked the question (Partially not true because I was asked Monday and it’s now Thursday and I’m finally finishing “some” of my thoughts):
“What are you afraid of?”

My mind immediately warned me that this was not the time nor place to dive into anything philosophical/metaphysical/theological. So (knowing good and well it wouldn’t fly) I simply said “I’m not really afraid of anything”. Well, I was right and that answer didn’t fly. That person quickly responded back “well then it should be easy for you to answer the question”. He was right and it was easy for me to answer but the answer without explanation came out sounding like a cop-out.

All day today (remember I started this Monday) I kept revisiting the question. Although I am still a little stumped as to why it was asked, I like (in an obsessive compulsive way) how it made me think.

At first I was thinking about how complex the question is. Am I afraid of what is tangible? What is unknown? The definition of afraid has many explanations; fear, regret, unwilling. And biblically fear is presented/described as respect. So with all of these definitions how does one quickly answer such a question?

I recently made the conscious decision that I would no longer be bound by fear. And what is fear anyway, but a strong-hold/vicious power that keeps us searching, lazy, insecure, and unaccountable (just to name a few). Fear puts you at the center of your life and this in my experience is a pretty lonely place, a place lacking in so many ways and highly destructive.

Now I’m human, I have feelings of frustration, hopelessness, (to get more extreme) and devastation. However, I also have feelings of hope, faith and devotion. The good helps me digest the bad. In life comes death and I’m not just talking in human existence, think of it as beginning and ending. Are we to be afraid to start if perhaps we aren’t able (for this that and the other reason) to finish? There is courage in starting, commitment to finish and so many things in between.

To be overly dramatic we could then ask the questions: why live if we are to die? Why love if it could just be met with hate? Who would want to live this way? And worse how sad is it that some do? To me it is such an unnecessary weight to carry especially when you can be saved out of it.

Now this subject/this question, I could go on and on with my thoughts and just for the record, I probably will. I will write part 2, 3, 4 to this question of fear and ask anyone to make comments answering this question. It’s been almost a week, the question was asked Monday and I’m just now finishing this posting and it’s Thursday. I’ve managed to continue (again the OCD) to think about this question almost convincing myself of certain horrid situations that would be “frightening”, nice thoughts I know! So I will collect more of my thoughts and revisit the subject.

Until next time I leave you to think about….”What are you afraid of?”

To Steal Or Not To Steal

Ok, so I'm sure I'm breaking every bloggers rule on posting fellow bloggers entries BUT this is too good to pass up!

I'm a huge fan (as is all of America it seems) of Dooce. Heather Armstrong's blog is nationally recognized and she recently posted "Rite of Passage". This entry isn't hers but from Sweet Juniper, another blog that Heather enjoys. So if you're still following me, this is my blog, I love Heather's blog and she loves Jim's blog.

I hope you enjoy reading "Rite of Passage" as much as I did and while you're there take a look at her other entries.

I'm sorry to say that I've been caught up in being a Mother to a potty-training son that I've never thought about the Father to the potty-training daughter. Here I post about my son wanting to "pee pee like Daddy" and me seriously considering either tie-dying my lovely white shower curtain or connecting the dots to see what sort of graphic appears but I can not even begin to imagine the filth Jim describes in this posting.

From this day forward I will be very thankful for the cleanliness in women's restrooms. I will also give thanks to all who clean Men's restrooms for it sounds like a real sh*t hole!

Wrinkles and Fire Flies

e: Why's that shirt up there Mommy?
/The shirt hanging on the shower curtain rod/
me: To get the wrinkles out e.
e: /looking into the tub/ I see one Mommy ...
/pointing to a dirt spec/
me: You see what e?
e: I see a wrinkle! it fell out!

I called it a dirt "spec" cause just plain-ol dirt sounds like I keep a dirty bathroom...it was just a spec, yep! I giggled and did my best to explain that wrinkles don't literally fall out. I think he would have understood me using an iron better but who uses those?!! when you have wrinkle release!

Last night we had a great visit with our friend Andrea. After school we headed to the loop and enjoyed dinner at Saleems "Where Garlic Is King". After all our bellies where full we said good night and headed home.

It was a bit past bed time so I was eager to get him to bed. Just as I was unlocking the door I got a glimpse of a lightening bug. "Fire Flies"' I shouted to e. At first he didn't know what I was talking about but as we crept up on some he was able to see a few up close and personal in my hands. Once we saw one the courtyard seemed to light up.

As soon as I would catch one he wouldn't want to light up. I explained that they were scared and would set them free. Then, to a wide-eyed little boy, I gave the comparison of a giant capturing him up in his hands and demanding a performance. We said good night and that we'd see them later.

e: Those flies turn off and on.
me: They do e! Do they have a switch?
e: /In a silly and why would you think that? voice/ Noooooo!

Happy Father's Day!

Yesterday was an amazing day, I was baptized! For some of you this is surprising news and for others you were there to witness it. For some I ask you to read this with an open mind and heart for I respect it will be...well, "different" and perhaps a bit "odd" to read.

I've posted a picture my good friend Karl took of the special day. I've also included my testimony and some journal entries. The journal entries were important for me to post because these are personal messages that carried me to this special day, notes of inspiration along my journey from the beginning.

I was thankful to have e and my Mother attend. I prepped e the following evening and the conversation went something like this:
me: "e tomorrow is a special day, we're going to go to Church and then to a party. At Church there is going to be a little pool and I'm going to go under the water cause I love Jesus. Grandma is going to hold you so you can see and all our friends will cheer. Afterwards our friends are going to have a party for Mommy and we'll eat and play, how does all that sound?" e: "Can I go in with you Mommy?" me: "One day e if you choose." e: "I love Jesus too." me: "I know e, one day. One day when you are old enough to write your story. e, what would your story say?" e: "hmmm, I love Jesus." me: "That's nice buddy."

He thought it was pretty fun. He came to give me a hug as I toweled off. My Mom also shared that as Bryan was praying for myself and Martin (the other person being Baptized) e stood there like a solider with his hands clasped listening behind me.

Ok, so I've probably given his father a heart attack...HA! kidding (well, kind of) and I can't promise there won't be some "faithful" comment next time he jumps into his kiddie pool.

My testimony:
Good morning, my name is Jodi Hertz and I am thankful to spend such an amazing day with my family of God. I grew up in the South, raised Catholic and as a newborn unaware of the commitment being made was baptized in a ritualistic ceremony.

I am now 34 years old, a Mommy to an amazing little boy Elliott and am today with humble pride announcing my commitment to Christ. This day for me represents; encouragement, accountability, discipline, integrity, commitment, unconditional love and hope. This day also represents my transformation from someone who simply respected faiths, into someone who is growing in a real relationship with Jesus.

Before Christ I carried the weight of life upon my own shoulders. I didn’t value anything greater than myself. I gave greater weight to symbolism, taking whatever appealed to me from all kinds of other belief systems. I failed to recognize the need of God’s Love in my heart. What I began to notice was that I repeatedly continued to feel empty and unfulfilled.

My relationship with Elliott’s father was dissolving and I was faced with the harsh reality that my life was not the one I wanted to live, and I did not have as much control over it as I had thought. This time of hurt cultivated my relationship with Jesus. One night I was praying out to some of my ‘gods’, and yet I was overwhelmed with the feeling that Jesus was near. Just as a Mother would tuck in her child, I felt safe in His loving company as I laid to rest. I was met and accepted just as I was, and was asked nothing but to welcome Him into my heart.

I am thankful for all my dear friends who along my journey with Christ helped guide my path. Now, I live life with great hope, trusting my hand in the Lords. I live a life in a committed, faithful and loving relationship with Jesus Christ.

“Look beyond the sun not below the clouds.” –Terry Virgo


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