Thursday's Second Post: "What Are You Afraid Of?"

Today I was asked the question (Partially not true because I was asked Monday and it’s now Thursday and I’m finally finishing “some” of my thoughts):
“What are you afraid of?”

My mind immediately warned me that this was not the time nor place to dive into anything philosophical/metaphysical/theological. So (knowing good and well it wouldn’t fly) I simply said “I’m not really afraid of anything”. Well, I was right and that answer didn’t fly. That person quickly responded back “well then it should be easy for you to answer the question”. He was right and it was easy for me to answer but the answer without explanation came out sounding like a cop-out.

All day today (remember I started this Monday) I kept revisiting the question. Although I am still a little stumped as to why it was asked, I like (in an obsessive compulsive way) how it made me think.

At first I was thinking about how complex the question is. Am I afraid of what is tangible? What is unknown? The definition of afraid has many explanations; fear, regret, unwilling. And biblically fear is presented/described as respect. So with all of these definitions how does one quickly answer such a question?

I recently made the conscious decision that I would no longer be bound by fear. And what is fear anyway, but a strong-hold/vicious power that keeps us searching, lazy, insecure, and unaccountable (just to name a few). Fear puts you at the center of your life and this in my experience is a pretty lonely place, a place lacking in so many ways and highly destructive.

Now I’m human, I have feelings of frustration, hopelessness, (to get more extreme) and devastation. However, I also have feelings of hope, faith and devotion. The good helps me digest the bad. In life comes death and I’m not just talking in human existence, think of it as beginning and ending. Are we to be afraid to start if perhaps we aren’t able (for this that and the other reason) to finish? There is courage in starting, commitment to finish and so many things in between.

To be overly dramatic we could then ask the questions: why live if we are to die? Why love if it could just be met with hate? Who would want to live this way? And worse how sad is it that some do? To me it is such an unnecessary weight to carry especially when you can be saved out of it.

Now this subject/this question, I could go on and on with my thoughts and just for the record, I probably will. I will write part 2, 3, 4 to this question of fear and ask anyone to make comments answering this question. It’s been almost a week, the question was asked Monday and I’m just now finishing this posting and it’s Thursday. I’ve managed to continue (again the OCD) to think about this question almost convincing myself of certain horrid situations that would be “frightening”, nice thoughts I know! So I will collect more of my thoughts and revisit the subject.

Until next time I leave you to think about….”What are you afraid of?”